‘God helps those who help themselves’, was the quote written on my class blackboard every day of the week when I was in 8th grade. When I initially read it, I appreciated it and absorbed it. Later I mulled over it and even agreed with it. Much later I took it for granted and began ignoring it.
Last year I decided I want to change my life, very obviously for the better. This lead to months of introspection. Introspection led to conclusions. Conclusions led to decisions and decisions led to actions.
A clean up drive in my life had begun. Even though I was pleased with the progress I made I realised I wasn’t happy with the results. That is when I decided to take a step back and re-examine some conclusions.
When I did that, I identified my biggest problem. It was me.It takes a lot of courage to admit to yourself that you are your biggest problem. Click To Tweet
If there is one realisation that maturity gifts us, it is the fact that we cannot change anyone but can certainly change ourselves.
Even as I was looking forward to making certain changes in my life to make it better, little did I realise that I was the one stopping it from changing like I wanted it to.
I continued seeing people and situations through rose tinted glasses, despite them having me shown me more colours that a rainbow held. I continued holding up my end of friendships and relationships exactly as they were, even though the people on the other end had long since ceased doing their bit. I gave people way too many chances, when I should have struck them off my list long ago. My behaviour towards people remained the same, even though theirs towards me steadily deteriorated.
Much like my reaction to that quote on my school blackboard, I had noticed the changes, understood them and later chose to ignore them. In short, I had allowed wrong behaviour to continue. When I did that my life remained the same, and I remained disgruntled.
I have slowly started making changes, within and around me. I no longer overlook traits and patterns that I am shown. Second chances are given sparingly and I am easing off the burden of one sided relationships.
Is it easy to do all this? It isn’t. It isn’t impossible either as I have someone, who knows me better than anyone else does, to help me out. Me.