Stop! #BangaloreMolestation


Yesterday, I turned an observer.

I observed myself.

I dressed up to meet a friend and as I did I realised that I looked at myself from every angle ensuring that the kurta I was wearing wasn’t too well fitted and my flowing hair stylishly, and cleverly, covered my chest. I even stood in the light of the balcony to ensure that my Patiala salwar wouldn’t turn transparent in the sunlight. As I walked to the mall I realised how tense I was, with elbows sticking out slightly to push away men who manage to ‘accidentally’ brush against you. My eyes were alert, looking for a look or a gesture that could spell trouble.

And do you know what saddened me the most? This is what most women do every single day, and they don’t even realise it.

Then I wondered if men, from strangers to the men we live with, our brothers, husbands, fathers, uncles and the like, even realise what it feels like to be a woman? Being guarded all the time, in real life and online. Thinking twice before you say or write something. Being trolled if you speak your mind.

As a Social Experiment, Women around the world should be allowed to behave and act out all they have seen, heard and experienced in their day to day lives as Women. Irrespective of their age and backgrounds women everywhere should behave like men do towards them, towards and with the men.
No this is not revenge, nor is is an eye for an eye. Sometimes people only understand what you go through only when it happens to them, and this is the only way to make Men realise what some of their fellow men put women through.
No, not all Men are bad. But almost all women have had an experience which was not pleasant.

The ever increasing news of injustice towards women is terrible. And what is even worse are the platitudes, cliches, snide remarks and the verbal post mortem that follows.

Let us develop empathy , and a backbone, to support someone when they need it.
Create a world where our sisters and daughters feel confident, feel safe and thrive. Don’t let your ‘It’s ok. It happens to everyone’ attitude encourage perpetrators and leave behind a world where all they can do is cringe and have to fight.

Because it may have happened to everyone, but that still doesn’t make it okay for it to continue.




6 thoughts on “Stop! #BangaloreMolestation

  1. This is the sad truth.Unfortunately empathy is a sign of high IQ and a country bursting at its seams seem to have a population of with zero EQ.No wonder the first thing they do is blame the girl.

  2. True Mayuri! It is true that we have been trained to be so very careful of our dress and behavior when around men, and even after taking all this care things like #BangaloreMolestation happen. In fact if a 4 year child and a 80 year aged woman can be raped and killed, do you think dress! Matters! I think it is a sick mind that is behind this.

  3. though we live in modern world but mentality of society is still the same. Yes more or less every girl goes through this in any form be it home , office , while travelling etc. Impressive post

  4. Victim blaming only in cases where women at the receiving end of such violence becomes a very myopic and regressive representation of the Indian society and the quicker we get rid of such views, the better as these arguments are housed within institutions like religion which captures the imagination of the masses. Such views must be rejected and ridiculed and spaces of meaningful discussions must be created.

  5. Agree all men are not same but cos of few men we start blaming all of them. These incidents do make us conscious and scared. We lose faith in our society as a whole. Hoping for some change in laws in our country.

  6. We women need to reclaim our space in the society; be free to loiter around and generally we be allowed to be free! These shackles whether on our mind or in physicallity are absurd and make us lead a half life.
    How sad is it that the better half of man lives such a poor half life!!!!

    I totally agree with you on the checking myeslf in the mirror and elbows out stance while walking!

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