What’s in a Surname?

Pic Courtesy: Google

We don’t have control over certain choices in life. Like, we never got to choose our genes, our relatives, the color of our eyes, and our surname.

Yes, surname.

Well, I hated mine! There! Out with it finally! Feel so much better now!
From the time I learnt what a surname was, and especially what MINE was, I have hated it!
Yeh bhi koi surname hai!? Why couldn’t I be born an Oberoi, or a Malhotra or, my all time fantasy, a Kapoor?

I was in school when Chetan Sharma was a new member in our then Indian Cricket Team. He was gaining popularity as a bowler and so I had my classmates asking me if we were related. To shine in reflected Sharma-glory was a temptation I couldn’t resist and I, proudly and pompously, lied through my teeth and said yes.

It may have been my imagination, but I got more respect at school after that.

All good things come to an end though.

That fateful cricket match happened, where Javed Miandad hit my soon-to-be-disowned ‘uncle’s’ last ball for a six and won back a match that went down in history.
I didn’t go to school for a week after that.

As a teenager, I had a wild fantasy that I would wake up one morning to hear that the government had banned the usage of the surname ‘Sharma’, and ahem, yours truly has been appointed to choose a new surname. It remained a fantasy.

Notice how all movies/serials/adverts have these typical safari-clad ‘Sharmaji’s’. Also all the corrupt or weak or smarmy or slimy people will definitely be, you guessed it, Sharma’s!
Thinking of holy matrimony, there was just one thing that scared the hell out of me.
Will ‘he’…biting my nails here…be…a cold shiver going up my spine….a…rolling my eyes till the whites show…Sharma? Followed by a shriek that was recorded 10.5 on the Richter scale!

When asked what kind of a guy I was looking for, I had just one thing on my list. NOT a Sharma.

Well, God works in mysterious ways, he giveth and taketh away.

Marriage helped me to get rid of Sharma. In return for ‘Nidigallu’. But then that’s a topic for another blog post.

Shakespeare once asked, ‘What’s in a name?’. Thank God he never asked, ‘What’s in a surname?’ Or I would have had plenty to say!

Disclaimer: This article has been written in good humor, so all my fellow-Sharma’s , safari-clad or otherwise, please read it in the same spirit.:-))))

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