Can love grow or diminish with time?


Love depends on a lot of factors. Respect, honesty, loyalty, compassion and empathy to name a few.

Like everything in the universe, love too undergoes various changes. Yes, it grows and it diminishes too. Sometimes love gets stronger and deeper as time goes by, while at other times it gets weaker and  just fades away.

There are so many couples who live like perfect strangers under the same roof, each seeking out someone else to ‘love’.
So many dead relationships around because there is no love any more.

The fierce intensity felt in the first flush of love mellows down to a comforting warmth as a relationship strengthens.
Then there are times when there is no love at all, just two people living together simply because they are habituated to  habituated to living with each other.

We are so enamored with the word ‘love’ and the feelings we imagine it brings and so scared of change that we stick to the belief that ‘nothing must change’ and don’t let go.

Would a parent who has been abandoned by their child in his/her old age, continue to love their child like they did before?
Would a spouse continue loving the other like they did before, if they were abused or cheated on or their trust was broken?

As I see it, Love is love only when two people feel it mutually.

Love that is ‘one-sided’ and never returned is not love. It chokes the other person who does not feel the same way towards you. When you love someone, and the other person does not, in a way you are emotionally and mentally arm-twisting them with your ‘love’ in the hope that someday they may feel the same way.

‘Unconditional Love’ is another fallacy. Giving without receiving is like feeding someone your share while you go hungry. Click To Tweet Sooner or later, when the ‘receiver’ moves on or the ‘giver’ is taken for granted, resentment starts setting in.

Love diminishes and love grows too. The measure of either is never felt immediately, and sometimes it is not felt at all by you. But by the other person.

….my views on an online discussion.

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