My Alter Ego and Me, in a tete-a-tete over a cup of tea

The world is such a wonderful place!
Things are just as they seem!
(Tee-hee. It’s the rose tinted glasses
that show her what she sees!)
People are honest
They say what they mean
(This statement is the best
it is such a scream!)
I’ve got true friends
Who’ll be there for me
(Did I mention the blinders
that stop her from seeing?)
I’m here to do my job
The rest I leave to God
(I’m sure He’s wondering
should I rewire her stupid thoughts?)
Every dark day ends
and arises a new dawn
(Gawd I’m so bored
I’m not even going to stifle this yawn!)
Happiness when shared
Generously multiplies
(Is she drugged or drunk
lemme check her glazed eyes)
Honesty is a virtue
that I hold very dear
( I can’t take anymore of this
I’m getting outta here!)

This is my 5th post for Week 3 for the Blogging Challenge #MyFriendAlexa by Blogchatter
I am taking my Alexa Rank to the next level with Blogchatter .
Current Rank (as on 1st September 2016) 
2,828,055 –  Alexa Traffic Rank
132,802 – Traffic Rank in India

I’m Still Weird Because

Another day! Another post!

This one inspired by Nabanitas post that had me chuckling.

I am optimistic this isn’t the last of, ‘how weird I am revelations’ and i have a feeling i shall be topping the list. Frequently.
Here goes!

I have borderline OCD, which means I am always tempted to straighten frames hung askew, or even a wee bit off, smoothen bed sheets or tablecloths, align furniture and footwear…you get the picture right? And all this in other peoples homes, hotel rooms and restaurants. And I have done it too.
I don’t drive. I have lost hope I ever will.
I hate anyone sitting on my bed once I’ve made it.
I bitch and moan to Mum about my siblings and the moment she agrees with something against them, a fire-breathing dragon has nothing on me! Mum has wisely learnt to just listen. Because she is not weird.
When I hang my clothes out to dry they have to be in ascending order, with the corners meeting.
I still ask people their star signs, and judge them accordingly in my mind.
I dislike drinking water from a glass, I have to swig it from the bottle to quench my thirst.
I could eat ice cream for breakfast, lunch, dinner and in between too. Add cookies to that and I am in heaven. Except Chocolate ice cream.
Papaya is my most favorite fruit.
When I am angry I turn even more polite and soft spoken. The angrier I am the more soft spoken I get. If my whisper is illegible, you should be running. Fast.
I dislike people asking to use my hairbrush, towels etc. If I am forced to share, I never use them again.
When I am really pissed with The Husband I use endearments to address him. Through gritted teeth.

I abhor people mispronouncing or abbreviating my name.

I have no idea how, but I have this habit of getting locked up in bathrooms.
I still gawk when a see a woman smoking.
I hate eating alone. I have sometimes skipped a meal because I was all by myself.
I love watching movies alone.
I enjoy people watching, and sometimes get so engrossed in doing so I may come across as a crazy stalker.

I file away quirks I see in people, and they turn up as a character in some story.

This post is part of the Half Marathon Blogging Challenge with BlogChatter

Day 7

A to Z: All that you wanted to know, but were afraid to ask :)

Tags are awesome! They act as the perfect fillers when you want to write, but have no idea what to write. 
So when I saw this tag on follow blogger, Shalini’s page I knew I had to do it!:) 
Do take it on if you wish to, it’s so much fun!:)

The A-Z of me!

A. Age :  …is just a number!

B. Biggest fear : that all of them will come true!

C. Current time : …is the right time!

D. Drink you last had : …vampire blood! Gotcha! Just a boring cup of tea.

E. Every day starts with : …checking Whatsapp/fb/Twitter 🙂

F. Favourite Song : …the title song from the film, ‘Kal Ho Na Ho’

G. Ghosts – Are they real? : …I wouldn’t know, I find people scarier!

H. Hometown : Bombay!

I. In love with : Myself!

J. Jealous of : …nothing and no one!

K. Killed someone : …not yet!:) Psstttttt….wish to though!

L. Last time you cried : …why must you know EVERYTHING?

M. Middle Name : …supercalifragilistic!

N. Number of siblings : 2

O. One wish : …why this austerity? They usually come in a trio, right?:)

P. Person you last called : …The Husband.

Q. Question you’re always asked : …is, ‘Are you a Bengali/Malayalee?’ (No one believes I am a Punjabi)

R. Reason to smile : …because I have a damn good one!

S. Sounds that annoy you : …certain people breathing (wicked! wicked!;))))

T. Time you woke up : 6 am

U. Underwear colour : All you need to know is that I wear mine on the inside, unlike Superman!

W. Worst habit : …borderline OCD

V. Vacation Destination : Big list. Need 

X. X-rays you last had : What’s next? Blood reports?

Y. Your Favourite Food : Pizza, anytime. Pasta, every time.

Z. Zodiac Sign : Gemini

This post is part of the Half Marathon Blogging Challenge with BlogChatter

Day 5

#5ThingsTrueAboutMe #BlogChallenge #MarathonBloggers

5 Things True About Me

1) I am terrified of pets. Even puppies and kittens. Even the sound of them. And I send a silent apology to them, via esp, each time they need to be tied up or confined to a room when I am visiting a pet lovers house.
2) I am a Punjabi married to Telugu. A proper arranged marriage where we met exactly 4 times before we decided to marry each other. Yes. True. Promise.

3) I was offered the ‘Pears Baby’ commercial when I was an infant and then when I was a toddler. Thrice. My parents refused, all 3 times. They owe an answer to showbiz. They still refuse to give me any satisfactory answer.
4)Never ask me for directions. If you follow mine, you’ll most probably reach Afghanistan. And come back just to shoot me dead.
5)It took me a really long time to learn that the opposite of love is not hate, it is indifference. And I am still fumbling my way through learning how to ‘forgive and forget’

And if you need to know more about me, you only have to ask…

Tags make for a great blog post. Especially when each time I write a post, it ends up as my magazine article instead! 😉 So, when I spotted this rather nippy and interesting Tag on Suniti’s blog, I asked her if I could borrow it for mine, and she Tagged me, pronto! Thanks, Suniti!:)

A -Available?
Who wants to know?

B-Best friend:
I just realized, I’ve outgrown all of them.

C-Cake or Pie?
Both! Sweet set of 32, being my excuse!

D-Drink of choice:
O J. Iced tea(peach). Flavored water.

E-Essential things used everyday:
Birkenstocks. Glasses. Scrunchies.

F-Favourite colour:
I am in-between favorite colors at the mo. Can’t decide between purple and green.

G-Gummi bears or worms:
Yuck to both! What do you think I am? 12, or Chinese?!


A great massage.

J-January or February:
I love both these months, and November and December. I don’t remember anyone asking, but I absolutely abhor March-April and July-August-September.

K-Kids and names:
Putting the cart before the horse, aren’t we now?


M-Marriage date:
You will be invited. If you promise to get me presents. Lots of them.

N-Number of siblings:

O-Oranges or apples:
Orange; the fruit, the flavor (except in cookies & chocolates) but never the color (Okay. Maybe I’ll allow it just as an accent color)

Incessant talkers. Depressing Whiners.

When they discover the center of the universe, a lot of people will be disappointed to discover they are not it.

R-Reason to smile:
Haven’t you heard? Smile. It keeps people wondering what you are up to! Also, there are times I smile because I have no idea what the hell is going on! And, the fact that I have a great one is reason enough to flash it at all other times 😉

Spring. Winter.

T-Tag three people:
Though I do realize that it won’t thrill them to bits, I tag Shelly, Anuja and Nautilius and hope they they’ll oblige me one more time.

U-Unknown fact about me:
The prolific blogger that I am, I would’ve guessed that, except for my PAN card number, my regular readers, and lurkers, would know everything about me. Apparently not.
So here goes an unknown fact about me; I was offered a Pears Soap advertisement contract when I was little. Mum declined. Wise decision I think, ‘coz, as a grown up, it would be have been mortifying to imagine how many people would have seen me frolicking in a bubble bath, topless.

V-Vegetable you do not like:
I am quite accomodating and can be successfully force-fed all vegetables. Though I don’t enjoy eating karela and some monstrosity called padwal at all.

W-Worst habit:
My computer-addiction. Its played havoc with my eyes!

X-x-rays you have had:
Really?! What’s next? Blood reports?

Y-Your favorite food: